This may be lengthy... but I shall try to keep it bullet style to avoid confusion. First a little background details. Theres this girl I've known a while now, probably a few years. Shes good and bad, for a long time I know she was interested in me, I warmed a little to some of what she did to "get my attention" but didn't always because she never outright said "I like you" so didn't want to spoil what we had. We have always had a kinda complex relationship, or as quite a lot of people we know have come to colourfully call it "lovers tiffs". She never seems to be able to stop smiling or giggling around me. Among other things which have happen in the past are things like this girl just "taking" a kiss once when I was very very very very drunk. Countless times we could of got jiggy and I've even heard of this girl on another occasion saying we kissed when we didn't. Nevermind what else may of been said I don't know about.
Now, a little about this girl directly. Bless shes the sweetest girl in the world but has been treated like hammered shit all her life, so she naturally has a lot of issues such as not being able to really trust anyone or let herself be vulnerable etc. For lack of a better short way to describe it you could say shes "damaged" in the mind.
To the point at hand, I took her out for valentines. Bought her a really soppy big card with teddies on, bunch of Roses and a really soft fluffy dog.
Heres what happened;
- I turned up just to give her the valentine stuff cos she didn't finish work till 10PM, so understandably she was tired.
- She suggests to me we go for a drink, wants me to pay for it, very much seems like shes treating things like a date.
- As usual she can't stop smiling, shes giggling and even blushing.
- We sit down, I give her the valentines stuff, she has a huge grin, is really happy and blushing a lot.
- We start having one of the best chats we have ever had, then randomly she says we are just friends (this is where it gets complicated)
Up to this point, and after it everything about her including her body language was suggesting we were most deffinately on the verge of being more than just friends, using all of her "womanly wiles" if you will. The confusion is 4-fold for me after her saying we are friends for these reasons;
1. Aside from all the giggling, blushing, etc, SHE was the one who wanted to go for a drink when originally we agreed I would just give her the presents cos she was tired after working so long.
2. She kept trying to "test" me in the typical way women do like "Shes pretty isn't she.." to which, of course, I had a great response when she was trying those things that just made her smile and blush more.
3. She kept doing things like playing with her boobs in front of me and making some quite naughty innuendos
4. Not so long ago, and whenever it happens, she always gives me real evils if another girl gives me a hug or starts getting a bit flirty. (have to use the name now
) Jems will be there very angry looking.. and even resort to standing in front of other girls who are acting flirty with me so I can't see. Hardly seems like she wants to be just friends does it?
Back to Valentines..
We get talking some more, not sure how the subject is bought up but we get talking about some of the "friends" she has, being opinionated and certainly not shy of saying what I think I tell her I think those people are *censored* because they treat her like crap and objectify her and I tell her I think its *censored* disgraceful. To that point her response is to yet again smile, blush a little and go "aww". Then something happens.. she starts to get things going through her mind, I can tell that, then she gets annoyed. Things end on a rocky note, and she even calls me this morning to rant at me while we talk. I send her a text later, she calls me about 10:30pm and it seems like shes trying to open up, be honest and trust me. At the same time shes still a bit pissed at me, but if it makes sence, also acting kinda "girlfriendy" and using a very sweet tone of voice.
Now I'm confused as hell (as you all probably are now
) trying to figure out whats going on. To me it seems like maybe shes having conflicting emotions, giving up on me, then suddenly finding out I do like her, all mixed in with her mental problems so theres masses of doubt flying around in her mind, possibly her thinking what she does now and so on. I'm usually good with women, but I'm so far past confused I need to call in the cavalry, so, any advice anyone? Feel free to ask any questions, theres a lot more info that could reveal things and help with this situation.