by DARK TEMPLAR on 08 Jun 2016 15:28
Change in eating habits (such as not being arsed to acquire sustenance some days) is more of symptom than a cause, at least according to the person to whom i was referred to per mandatory checkup for the reserve training. Keyword being mandatory , as in enforced by law (it is also quite probable that had I been less tight lipped, they may have done more than just exempt me from training that includes weapon handling, not that I gave them reason to worry about that aspect, at least I don't think so) ... while I am well aware that it would most likely be of decent assistance, if i was able to voluntarily engage in communication beyond shallow interaction with people around me, I doubt I would be venting here. Even this is difficult at times, though I have gotten used to you folks (and some others from the GSC forums, which is the longest I have kept in touch with anyone aside from close family members, not even quite sure as to why that is) as acquaintances, what allows me to more easily converse is that fact that I do not have to meet you face to face to do so and even despite that many of the lines I put down here, I go over in my head many, many times and often disregard the idea/s alltogether. (ad:this reply itself was sat upon for a good two hours)
All that said however, I do try to get better as I understand that as things are, the chances of me becoming a functioning, let alone useful member of society are minimal. The prospect becoming simply a burden to others does not appeal to me, despite my lack of regard for most people.
THE DEDICATED, CERTIFIED RESIDENT MADMAN
There is no such thing as innocence in the ZONE, only degrees of guilt.
CAN YOU FEEL THE TRANQUILLITY OF THE ZONE
Knowledge is power. Guard it well.
We are shaped by fate, just as we shape it
You should never be in the company of anyone with whom you would not want to die.
Akir man yamut malak al-mut